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I'm afraid chemical dependency is what it sounds like!

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    I'm afraid chemical dependency is what it sounds like!

    I remember on TV an abortion Doctor said he looked at the twitching limb of a partially dismembered fetus and he said he realized "population control is what it sounds like."

    I don't know whether he is pro-life , but his words had an impact.

    I'm beginning to realize something similar about my profession as a slave to the crystal Goddess.

    Chemical dependency is what it sounds like. You become dependant on your higher power for all things, so without her, you really can do nothing but sleep.

    Cleaning , showering, doing laundry, praying, attending social events, going on my pilgrimages to sacred monuments and memorials, having faith, being a good person, doing good deeds, all depended on whether or not I had my daily dosage of Holy Communion with my "Crystal Fascismo Movimiento político y social de carácter totalitario y nacionalista fundado".

    Crystal Meth for me was sacramental, because my fervor for Fascism and Religion came out under the influence.

    Crystal Meth came out in my favorite Fascist nation, the island archipelago, land of the gods, land of the rising sun, 1919, same year as the discovery of the Fascist party in Italy.

    19 I identified as the " Destiny number" before I knew what Fascism was, calling 19th of each month, destiny day , a day to pray for destiny.

    The correlation made was phenomenal because my destiny was Shinto, Catholicism, Meth, and Fascism.

    Shinto and Meth come from the land of the rising sun 1919. Roman Catholicism and Fascism come from Italy 1919.

    Shinto has no Holy Communion, so Meth became my Holy Communion.

    And being "Under the influence" was what it sounds like. It felt like I was under the influence of Kami, possessed and controlled by them. It was great.

    The problem is, the enslavement to these Spirits cripples your ability to function independent of them.

    You essentially cannot. The master , teacher, shepherd , disappears, the sheep and pupil suddenly has something worse than a broken heart.

    Zero ability to function. It feels like having no soul.

    But the master always awaits with open arms to bring me out of hell and into heaven.

    I don't know what the answer is.

    But Chemical dependency is indeed what it sounds like. You depend on it to function.

    Thoughts?


    #2
    Your body belongs to the State now, with all deference being rendered to the great and mighty Kami to do as they please. Mussolini is forgiving.

    Comment


      #3
      Man I'm an alcoholic and can somewhat relate. Different drug and different effects, I'm aware of that. Chemical dependency sucks no matter what it is. You can stop, but only when you are ready for it. Have you ever tried talking to other crystal users who have managed to stop? It might help.

      Comment


        #4
        Originally posted by neonspectraltoast View Post
        Your body belongs to the State now, with all deference being rendered to the great and mighty Kami to do as they please. Mussolini is forgiving.
        I'd be inclined to believe that IF the state supplied the chemicals. Instead they do their best to curtail my supply. They call me terrible names like Addict, Substance Abuser, Alcoholic and Chemically-dependent. It's as if they want me to avoid the very drugs that would allow them to run roughshod over my very will to live.

        Comment


          #5
          No, they just want to control the fruk flo.

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by neonspectraltoast View Post
            Your body belongs to the State now, with all deference being rendered to the great and mighty Kami to do as they please. Mussolini is forgiving.
            Mussolini wants moderation. When Catholic priests take holy communion, if they get shit face drunk off the blood of Christ, that is abuse of Holy Communion.

            So, I believe Mussolini told me not to abuse holy communion or that is communion with the Devil.

            I also believe he told me to clean my room and not trade food stamps for meth.

            I don't always obey.

            Comment


              #7
              Originally posted by tumbling.dice View Post
              Man I'm an alcoholic and can somewhat relate. Different drug and different effects, I'm aware of that. Chemical dependency sucks no matter what it is. You can stop, but only when you are ready for it. Have you ever tried talking to other crystal users who have managed to stop? It might help.
              Yeah,
              im actually in outpatient rehab.

              Covid really fucks up everything though.

              I'd need some miracle and something in real life that got me motivated and energy to do chores, get a job, do the activities I like to do, focus, concentrate, etc.

              So, idk, my friends and neighbors in real life are drug users

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