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What is something miserable you are glad you went through?

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    #1

    What is something miserable you are glad you went through?


    Saint Dominic used to tell people "pray for the grace to love suffering".

    Could you imagine how much better life would be if you loved experiencing old age, sickness, and death of loved ones.

    Or you love being tired, dissapointmented, working a boring job etc.

    People will dissapointment you. Misery could be right around the corner. You could lose everything you worked so hard for because some drunk driver hit you.

    Isn't it beautiful? :P . Why not?

    If your dreams are stolen and broken or you are living in poverty with annoying people like most people are, rejoice over it.

    Your other options are to despair and be demoralized and miserable. Okay, maybe not rejoice offer it. I confess I hate being a sicko and drug addict.

    It isn't anything to rejoice over.

    Anyway, I'm glad I went to jail because I needed sobriety and the wake up call.

    I'm not glad Lia got "petrified", but something good came out of it. I've been using meth since age 15 and drug abuse has made me very insensitive to hurting other people's feelings. It's also something I find myself powerless over.

    I don't think I'll be able to stay sober back home so just got approved for rehab.

    Is there any type of suffering or misery you went through that you feel was good for you?
    Tags: None
    #2
    Depression, humiliation, and rejection, during my teenage and young adult years. Trying to fit in and being rejected over and over and over again. Little did i know it would lead to such an amazing and liberating life.

    Betrayal and heartbreak from a lover. I've learned much from that.
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      #3
      My misery is neverending it seems. What a hug would mean...it hurts to know I'll never get one. It hurts to think, it hurts to be. I wouldn't wish my life on my worst enemy. All I've got is years of time to do for a crime I didn't commit. That's what I get for being born to a sociopath. I'm often afraid I have died. Not sure there's any part of me left.
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        #4
        1. Contemplating daily suicide in June 2018, then getting counseling to contemplate daily loving my life that I've never loved as much as I do now and going forward.

        2. Thanksgiving 2020 having the worst ever hangover from edibles/alcohol combo in my life. November 30th, 2020 quitting cold turkey, and still sober n clean since.
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          #5
          Being put on behavior and mood control psychotropic meds. I wish I wasn't on them for so long. But it did teach me there is nothing wrong with me, that I can achieve anything with a golden mindset, and I can conquer depression and negativity without pills. It was a hard awakening to learn that doctors and therapists I once trusted and cared about are backstabbers and clueless idiots who do what the industry tells them.
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            #6
            Originally posted by the Riddler View Post
            My misery is neverending it seems. What a hug would mean...it hurts to know I'll never get one. It hurts to think, it hurts to be. I wouldn't wish my life on my worst enemy. All I've got is years of time to do for a crime I didn't commit. That's what I get for being born to a sociopath. I'm often afraid I have died. Not sure there's any part of me left.
            It's terrible you feel that way. I don't know if you would benefit from a hug from someone creepy like me, but I would surely offer a hug if I knew it would help you feel better and I were there. ((Hugs)

            You aren't the only one who feels very empty.

            Many people who appear happily married with a nice car , nice house, credit, and many "friends" or aquaintences feel just as unhappy as you and commit or contemplate suicide.

            It's a tragic world for most people.

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            • Matthew Mussolini
              #6.3
              Matthew Mussolini commented
              08-18-2021, 11:57 PM
              Editing a comment
              After I jumped off that building and woke up unable to move with tubes coming out of my throat so I couldn't talk, unable to pee from scar tissue clogging urethra, then after surgery pissing blood clots larger than marbles and ten weeks in a wheelchair, a life of a junkie, chronic desires to die that I was first hospitalized for age 10, chronic shame, guilt, and humiliation.
            • Matthew Mussolini
              #6.4
              Matthew Mussolini commented
              08-18-2021, 11:57 PM
              Editing a comment
              I can't say I know what you are going through or that anyone does, but I certainly know what suffering, misery, and death feels like.
            • neonspectraltoast
              #6.5
              neonspectraltoast commented
              08-19-2021, 12:33 AM
              Editing a comment
              Oh. No, you don't have the foggiest what I've been through. I'm not sure anyone on Earth ever had a more fucked up life, in all seriousness.

              Maybe I will start complaining relentlessly.
            #7
            Originally posted by Tropical Breeze View Post
            Depression, humiliation, and rejection, during my teenage and young adult years. Trying to fit in and being rejected over and over and over again. Little did i know it would lead to such an amazing and liberating life.

            Betrayal and heartbreak from a lover. I've learned much from that.
            That's awesome that you can see good in something so ugly!

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              #8
              Originally posted by Pete's Draggun View Post
              1. Contemplating daily suicide in June 2018, then getting counseling to contemplate daily loving my life that I've never loved as much as I do now and going forward.

              2. Thanksgiving 2020 having the worst ever hangover from edibles/alcohol combo in my life. November 30th, 2020 quitting cold turkey, and still sober n clean since.
              Congratulations!

              You never struck me as a guy who ever would have contemplated suicide regularly.

              It isn't like I claim to know you that well, but you come across in my opinion as someone who had a happier than average good life.

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              • Pete's Draggun
                #8.1
                Pete's Draggun commented
                08-19-2021, 12:01 AM
                Editing a comment
                I was damaged severely with my mental stability having a wife simultaneously diagnosed with lung and breast cancer, then her death in June 2018.

                I was totally cured of suicide desires in May of 2020.
              • neonspectraltoast
                #8.2
                neonspectraltoast commented
                08-19-2021, 12:17 AM
                Editing a comment
                Thank goodness, Pete. Makes me tear up just thinking about it.
              #9
              a lot of miserable experiences are actually beneficial in the long run, as those are the experiences that you learn the most from. so for the most part, i'm glad for all of them.

              it's hard for me to really answer this thread though, because another thing i've learned is semi-blocking bad memories. not like they are no longer in my head, but i have a really hard time recalling them without direct prompting. i've noticed that several times when trying to answer threads like this one. i know for a fact that i've had bad experiences that led to personal growth, but fuck me if i can think of one right now.
              • Likes 1

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                #10
                Originally posted by the Riddler View Post
                What a hug would mean...it hurts to know I'll never get one.
                If you are patient and you keep looking for one, I bet you'll get a hug some day
                "I like big butts and I can not lie"
                - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

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                • neonspectraltoast
                  #10.1
                  neonspectraltoast commented
                  08-19-2021, 03:09 AM
                  Editing a comment
                  Is it so transparent that I'm after hugs? I hope?
                • OP1
                  #10.2
                  OP1 commented
                  08-19-2021, 03:46 AM
                  Editing a comment
                  Yes, it's transparent
                #11
                Pete's Draggun

                I'm sorry that things were so bad then, but I'm glad that things are better
                "I like big butts and I can not lie"
                - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

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                • Pete's Draggun
                  #11.1
                  Pete's Draggun commented
                  08-19-2021, 06:42 AM
                  Editing a comment
                  OP1

                  You reached out and gave me lots of helpful links in the cancer threads to read back at the other place in 2016
                • OP1
                  #11.2
                  OP1 commented
                  08-20-2021, 12:29 AM
                  Editing a comment
                  I'm glad they were helpful
                #12
                kidney stones..multiple times

                its one of those pains that if you go thru it without pain meds you know you can handle just about anything else that could come along

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                  #13
                  Every miserable time that has happened has contributed to who and where I am now, and I'm grateful for who and where I am.

                  Like Undies, I find it hard to recall exact details. Back when I was more unhappy, I dwelled on negative details, so I think losing that is a good thing.

                  Most recently, summer 2019 was emotionally difficult but incredibly awakening.

                  And the physically hardest day of my whole life was another one that left me very strong. A bit like what SpaceMan said: if I got through that, then I know I can get through a lot.

                  Comment

                    #14
                    Sounds insensitive to say because a lot of people suffered great losses last year, but - last year. I feel like it woke me up in a way.

                    Lots of personal stuff, and one particular event that happened right before the pandemic started that really served as a catalyst for everything, but the pandemic threw the entire world off its linear path and I think that's what gave me the courage (not to mention the time and solitude lol) to really face things and deal with them

                    Really learned last year how to stop shoving miserable things in life deep down where I don't have to think about them, and learned how to just swim in the miserable lol, and to grow from it
                    • Likes 1

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                      #15
                      Originally posted by Tropical Breeze View Post
                      Depression, humiliation, and rejection, during my teenage and young adult years. Trying to fit in and being rejected over and over and over again. Little did i know it would lead to such an amazing and liberating life.
                      Everyone has a choice to make, to be loved or to be free

                      Just a little lyric from a song I like, but it's something I think about a lot.

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