Number 1 complaints men and women have about each other

[6-eyed]

I remember being taught this my freshman year of college in a Family Dynamics class I took. And I wanna see if TF agrees with this.

The number one complaint men have about women:
Women keep trying to change us

The number one complaint women have about men:
Men keep trying to solve ALL our problems

Now keep in mind I don't know of ALL the main relationship complaints really are, but this class professor said these were the main ones.

In the early days of my last relationship, my girlfriend got super annoyed with me whenever she vocalized a problem she was having, and I kept on trying to rescue her from any problem she brought up. That's what brought back the memory of this class lecture.

I was also in a broken relationship many years ago circa 2013, when my girlfriend at the time had the intention of making me a better man, but she convinced me to cut my hair way too short, and tried to get me to be more emotionally outspoken, more soft and sensitive. But her trying to change me wasn't the worst thing about her; she was just manipulative, psychotic, and even physically abusive at times.

So I'd say my number one complaint about women is their ability to go from happy to pissed off in 2 seconds without warning.

Do you all agree with the class lesson? Why/Why not?

[Undies]

i can see the women's complaint. i think a lot of man brains do function in the "there's a problem? how do i fix it?" style. years in customer service taught me how to overcome that; a majority of the time when a customer is having a fit about something, they just need someone to hear them out. the same often goes for people who are stressed about anything.

i've heard the women trying to change us thing a lot, but i've never really felt it firsthand. i can't think of any relationship i've had where the woman did much of anything to try and change me, or even brought up any issues at all. maybe that's a better complaint for me, if there's a problem with you they don't bother to tell you about it.

[WritersPanic]

Since I'm sort of retired, she sort of leaves me the fuck alone with my eccentricities. I was never into sports and only marginally into cars. But I am very interested in off-grid power production. I'm also interested in staying as stoned as I can, within reason. I also quit cutting my hair again and I have been pedaling the recumbent bike in my office several times a day while I watch videos of people lying about current events.

I have a God damned hematoma in the outer joint of my left traffic finger from carrying jugs of milk in plastic grocery bags. I forget how old I am and that it takes me a long time to heal from so many casual accidents. I fell on an uneven sidewalk a couple of years ago and cracked 3 ribs when I tried to tuck in and roll. It took 3 weeks before I could laugh without wanting to scream and sneezing was torture for twice that long.

[GLEN......]

i can't think of any relationship i've had where the woman did much of anything to try and change me, .

Tis Virtually Impossible To Change A "Lost Cause".............................................



Cheers Glen.

[Jessica]

I don't think enough men understand the difference between how men and women experience sex. It means that a lot of them, while not being bad at it, aren't especially good, either.

[Tropical Breeze]

Actually, one of the things women like about me is that i almost never give advice or try to solve their problems for them. I listen and ask questions. Though i have pissed off a few whenever i made a joke about their problems. I guess they see it as being mocked.

I can definitely see making a joke about someone's problems as worse than trying to solve it.

[Jessica]

I get the urge to do the joke thing, too, but I most often suppress it. It helps me though, to make a joke of my own problems :-)

[neonspectraltoast]

I don't ever have to worry about this. And, in fact, a relationship isn't something I actively or passively seek out. Not that it would matter, because I'm too sensitive, and women want to be choked and fucked hard and all that. And the whole notion of sex, putting your weiner inside something for good feelings, seems abysmally absurd and childish to me. Not that I wouldn't want it if I were in a relationship, but to consummate it. But like I said, women just want five dicks hammering their mouths at once.

[Jessica]

You know there are men who like being choked too, right?

[neonspectraltoast]

Yeah. It's disgusting. Y'all just want to be some gooey mess of heat and pleasure. I totally get it. What appeals to me is caring more so than a strict focus on the genitals. I'm gentle. Women would rather be a helpless heaving mass. And many men. The desire to be controlled is ludicrous.

[Amerijuanican]

I don't understand all the choking, biting (nibbling playfully, maybe), being tortured/mistreated, etc.
Always saw sex as an expression of love in the closest way possible. A total appreciation of each other and desire to please each other.
Why one sex likes the power of withholding sex or belittling all men as not good enough, etc. like we've seen since the 70s/80s is just a societal feminist power trip. That's not love.

[neonspectraltoast]

I know that's a little unfair, but kinda fair, too.

[neonspectraltoast]

So I guess my complaint about women is they're totally illogical and inherently malicious.

Some claim sensitivity is important, then they want you to pull their hair. Sorry, it doesn't work that way. Sensitivity means nothing to a woman, nor does confidence except wherein it's arrogance.

The truth is women absolutely adore arrogance, though they'll assign to arrogant men all positive qualities, including sensitivity, if that can be viewed as positive. If it's a matter of competition, the arrogant man will win favor, even if he loses.

[Youfreeme]

A good remedy that I've learned to the problem presented in the OP:

When your partner (or anyone, actually) is about to vent to you about something, just ask:

"Would you like me to just listen, or do you want advice?" or something along those lines.

Solves the problem, often enough.

[Jessica]

I appreciate this kind of straightforwardness!

[mallyboppa]

My mrs said I never listen to her or some bollox or another I was playing pop the bubbles on me fone so I didnt quite get the full story

[Irminsul]

A good remedy that I've learned to the problem presented in the OP:

When your partner (or anyone, actually) is about to vent to you about something, just ask:

"Would you like me to just listen, or do you want advice?" or something along those lines.

Solves the problem, often enough.

I could easily see this going the other way, if I said that to my wife, the very moment I give her that option is the very exact moment she'd realise I wasn't interested in the first place. 😅 And we both know if she chooses the listening option, it's like, phew, I got outta that one easy.

So I'd try that with maybe someone I didn't know, but I may as well be made outta glass with her cause she'd see right through that. 😂

[Youfreeme]

Haha, well I am sure you two have an established communication system by now!

[Youfreeme]

I usually just say that I need to vent or I’ll ask an opinion. Because most times, I can solve my own problems but it annoys me that I have them, so I want to bitch.

[Vanilla Gorilla]

How to keep your legs closed before marriage

[Meliai]

I dont think I mind the thing where men try to fix it
I can't think of a specific example where it's bothered me, at any rate. But I also dont think I really vent just to vent, if I go to someone about a problem it's because I've already sat on it and turned it over in my head a thousand times and am seeking an outside perspective for clarity.


I think for meeeee...its how men handle emotions. Not really anyone's fault because it's cultural conditioning. But a lot of men don't really process the emotional stuff in a healthy manner.