So, I must have made it roughly 48 hours sober cuz I let an Ethiopian visitor smoke quite a bit of my dope, and that was that.
I already explained that when sober I don't do shit but stew in my misery, guilt, and lay in bed all day when I'm not eating or using the restroom. In other words, when sober, I'm worthless , and a friggin zombie.
So, I relapsed today. I didn't have money so I traded two bottles of dish soap and laundry detergent for some magic Crystals. I blessed them, covered them in the blood of Jesus, asked all Angels, Saints, and Kami to bless and transubstantiate them into "Holy Communion (Shinto Eucharist of Esoteric Mussoliniology)" with Ecclesiastical Latin liturgical rubrics. (I literally celebrate a Crystal Meth Mass.
Jesus comes in the form of bread and wine. Caesar Mussolini comes in the form of Crystal Meth. Jesus would have more followers if holy communion was meth instead of bread and wine.)
Suddenly the misery is magically gone. I got off my dead ass and panhandled 23 bucks in two hours, went to Mass, prayed fervently everywhere I go, and even let a homeless guy spend the night. We smoked a bowl and I fed him two bowls of cheerios.
(I literally only have one dish bowl because I traded all my other dishes for Meth).
The homeless guy was paranoid and said "if anyone asks who was here, tell them it was RA!". I told him, " Ra is the name of the most important Egyptian God who made all creatures. Ra is the Egyptian sun God".
He responded, "I just made it up".
Well, since the Old Testament, in Joseph's prophetic dream, says Mussolini is the Sun, I identify Mussolini as both Ra and Apollo (Sun Deities). So, for my visitor to say he was Ra, it meant to me that the homeless people I let stay at my house, or give them food, drugs, or anything, I do the good deed for Ra (Mussolini).
mussolini-gettyimages-515354608.jpg
71pa-YsNKqL.jpg
On the last day Mussolini will say, " I was a stranger and you welcomed me, hungry and you gave me to eat, I needed a place to smoke meth and you welcomed me, I was feinding and you smoked me out.
What you did for the least of my people you did for the Caesar.
3788812._UY242_SS242_.jpg
Welcome to my Holy Roman Empire. I have a big house for you and Meth that has no come-down, is good for you, and more euphoric each day than the day before. Come inherent your eternal reward!"
drug-facts-crystal-meth.jpg BKIHDTR22II6TMIL6BNCFZ2YMU.jpg
But what I've come to realize is Meth is both good and bad for me. Without meth I'd be in bed all day.
Thanks to Meth I go panhandling, smile at people , wave, bless everyone I see, ride my bike and take the train to places I find sacred, and love being alive, and everything is fascinating, and there is never a minute to waste...."every minute must be spent seeking enlightenment and unity with heavenly beings , blessing and interceding for the world, and doing good deeds," is my attitude on meth.
When sober I waste all my time dwelling on my misery and the world's misery and guilt from the past. I don't do that on dope.
All things considered, I have a habit where the fix is usually 10 to 20 dollars max a day to maintain. That really isn't that expensive of a habit when you consider it makes all the misery disappear, and motivates me to do positive, healthy deeds and think only positive constructive thoughts.
It could prevent me from killing myself.
I truly think Tina was my destiny, meant for me, my body wired to find her to be the remedy to most of my ills.
It really doesn't look at all like I should quit! All things considered. I weighed the pros and the cons.
I already explained that when sober I don't do shit but stew in my misery, guilt, and lay in bed all day when I'm not eating or using the restroom. In other words, when sober, I'm worthless , and a friggin zombie.
So, I relapsed today. I didn't have money so I traded two bottles of dish soap and laundry detergent for some magic Crystals. I blessed them, covered them in the blood of Jesus, asked all Angels, Saints, and Kami to bless and transubstantiate them into "Holy Communion (Shinto Eucharist of Esoteric Mussoliniology)" with Ecclesiastical Latin liturgical rubrics. (I literally celebrate a Crystal Meth Mass.
Jesus comes in the form of bread and wine. Caesar Mussolini comes in the form of Crystal Meth. Jesus would have more followers if holy communion was meth instead of bread and wine.)
Suddenly the misery is magically gone. I got off my dead ass and panhandled 23 bucks in two hours, went to Mass, prayed fervently everywhere I go, and even let a homeless guy spend the night. We smoked a bowl and I fed him two bowls of cheerios.
(I literally only have one dish bowl because I traded all my other dishes for Meth).
The homeless guy was paranoid and said "if anyone asks who was here, tell them it was RA!". I told him, " Ra is the name of the most important Egyptian God who made all creatures. Ra is the Egyptian sun God".
He responded, "I just made it up".
Well, since the Old Testament, in Joseph's prophetic dream, says Mussolini is the Sun, I identify Mussolini as both Ra and Apollo (Sun Deities). So, for my visitor to say he was Ra, it meant to me that the homeless people I let stay at my house, or give them food, drugs, or anything, I do the good deed for Ra (Mussolini).
mussolini-gettyimages-515354608.jpg
71pa-YsNKqL.jpg
On the last day Mussolini will say, " I was a stranger and you welcomed me, hungry and you gave me to eat, I needed a place to smoke meth and you welcomed me, I was feinding and you smoked me out.
What you did for the least of my people you did for the Caesar.
3788812._UY242_SS242_.jpg
Welcome to my Holy Roman Empire. I have a big house for you and Meth that has no come-down, is good for you, and more euphoric each day than the day before. Come inherent your eternal reward!"
drug-facts-crystal-meth.jpg BKIHDTR22II6TMIL6BNCFZ2YMU.jpg
But what I've come to realize is Meth is both good and bad for me. Without meth I'd be in bed all day.
Thanks to Meth I go panhandling, smile at people , wave, bless everyone I see, ride my bike and take the train to places I find sacred, and love being alive, and everything is fascinating, and there is never a minute to waste...."every minute must be spent seeking enlightenment and unity with heavenly beings , blessing and interceding for the world, and doing good deeds," is my attitude on meth.
When sober I waste all my time dwelling on my misery and the world's misery and guilt from the past. I don't do that on dope.
All things considered, I have a habit where the fix is usually 10 to 20 dollars max a day to maintain. That really isn't that expensive of a habit when you consider it makes all the misery disappear, and motivates me to do positive, healthy deeds and think only positive constructive thoughts.
It could prevent me from killing myself.
I truly think Tina was my destiny, meant for me, my body wired to find her to be the remedy to most of my ills.
It really doesn't look at all like I should quit! All things considered. I weighed the pros and the cons.
Comment