I have a cat. He's almost 9 years old. I haven't made the best choices during our time together and I really regret it. I spent so much time away that he ended up adopting himself into a new household. Which I completely understand.
My ex and I have a fucked up relationship. He was the reason why I spent so much time away, because I was with him all the time. And now we're reconnecting, kind of, and he wants me to visit him. He can't come to my house because of my living situation, he understands this.
We were talking on the phone the other day. He asked when I was coming down. I said well I go back to work on Tuesday, I can come over then. He challenges this. "Why don't you just come over now?" heavy on the whine. He knows I'm not working so I have time. When we first met, I would make the 2+ hour journey to his house no problem. I'm older now, I really don't have the patience to go back and forth like that just to go hang out. And I feel bad leaving my cat. So I told him this, I feel guilty leaving Weasley. He got so mad. "a cat?? Really? Why can you just say things and that's how it is?" I was like.. Excuse me? Me telling you how I feel is "telling things how they are?" I don't fucking understand that sentence. Yes, me tell you my feelings is how it is. He says "but I want you to come over" and I say no. He says "why do you always get to dictate the way things are" I said "dude you are trying to CONTROL me and get me to do what you want without considering MY feelings. It's Tuesday or nothing." and then idk he went off about something and I said I had to go and that was it.
So. My question is, how would you feel if someone you liked said they feel bad leaving their animal and would prioritize a 2+ hour trip to see you when it was convenient for them?
I have suggested he come up here and we could go out and hang out for the day, and he has not, and will never do that, but expects me to come down on a whim, his whim, and disrupt my whole life.
My ex and I have a fucked up relationship. He was the reason why I spent so much time away, because I was with him all the time. And now we're reconnecting, kind of, and he wants me to visit him. He can't come to my house because of my living situation, he understands this.
We were talking on the phone the other day. He asked when I was coming down. I said well I go back to work on Tuesday, I can come over then. He challenges this. "Why don't you just come over now?" heavy on the whine. He knows I'm not working so I have time. When we first met, I would make the 2+ hour journey to his house no problem. I'm older now, I really don't have the patience to go back and forth like that just to go hang out. And I feel bad leaving my cat. So I told him this, I feel guilty leaving Weasley. He got so mad. "a cat?? Really? Why can you just say things and that's how it is?" I was like.. Excuse me? Me telling you how I feel is "telling things how they are?" I don't fucking understand that sentence. Yes, me tell you my feelings is how it is. He says "but I want you to come over" and I say no. He says "why do you always get to dictate the way things are" I said "dude you are trying to CONTROL me and get me to do what you want without considering MY feelings. It's Tuesday or nothing." and then idk he went off about something and I said I had to go and that was it.
So. My question is, how would you feel if someone you liked said they feel bad leaving their animal and would prioritize a 2+ hour trip to see you when it was convenient for them?
I have suggested he come up here and we could go out and hang out for the day, and he has not, and will never do that, but expects me to come down on a whim, his whim, and disrupt my whole life.
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